Hollis Baker’s Blog

Hanging around the “Whittlers Bench” you can hear some wondrous things being discussed. And I have the tendency of believing them all. Past adventures is one of the most often used story lines. These stories range from wild horse roping to big fish catching. If you lined up all the horses corralled and the fish netted end-to-end they would reach from here to Andice. And handsome horses and fat fish they all were. But please don’t ask for the exact meadow or fishing hole they came from, for these things are private information being kept secret for future use.

Another theme used around the “Whittlers Bench” is dangerous encounters. Or encounters of any nature. These tales usually began, “One day, back in the fifties, this ole boy——–“. The characters in these stories have by now gone to their rewards, or are pushing walkers down rest home hallways. But they were heroic and important in their time. And speaking of heroes, the teller, most often, come out on top in the conclusion. And some time the conclusion is evasive and hard to recognize. In fact, some conclusions never happen; they just trail off into the never never land. However I enjoy them all and make a mental note to tell the tale myself in another time and another place. Shucks, I just might get to be the hero if I am careful with the telling.

Politics are not discussed much around the bench. Occasionally a new boy will broach the subject of happenings in our government, both local and national, with zeal and excitement. He is usually ignored, or put in his place with tact and he learns soon this is not the place. It is neat to see the professional men in session skirt the subject.

But by far the most popular subject in story telling is the weather. “Boy, aint it hot today?” One question that is always asked, “How much rain did you get?” Another popular query is, “How are the crops?” With all the rain we have been blessed with recently frogs have become a popular subject. Alfred Nelson came by the other day and told of mowing his grass. He said he was about half way through mowing his rather large lawn when he spied a big frog right in front of where he was mowing. He didn’t have time to stop and ran right over the rascal. Alfred stopped, looked back, and there the frog sat. Alfred said he swears he winked. I’ll fix him for his smart-aleck way. He backed the mower over the frog real fast and looked forward. There he sat, this time with raised fist. Alfred raced forward and stopped right on top of the frog. But he did not hear a ”bump” he expected when he should have hit him. Getting off the lawn mower and looking under the deck, he saw the frog just grinning and jumping the blade each time it came around. Super frog if there ever was one.

Now I like and believe this tale. Thank you Alfred. If you want to hear a neat story, well told, with verve and honesty, come by the “Whittlers Bench” and sit a spell.